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Truth is, I am not big boned.

I've always been overweight ever since I was a kid. Well almost always, but that isn't the point of this post. People used words like "big boned", and "baby fat." Until I got older then those words turned to "you're really going to eat that", and just "fat." Somewhere theres a transition though I can't… Continue reading Truth is, I am not big boned.

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Just one small step.

I haven't restarted my exercise program for I fear that I may be headed straight into another attack. I've woken up the last few mornings with an achey face, and jaw. This usual means I am going to experience pure hell very soon. I think the anxiety of waiting for it to strike again may… Continue reading Just one small step.

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But they’re wrong.

It is a hard thing to admit when you've let your circumstances get the best of you. Both to yourself, and out loud. It is hard to admit when once again you have failed, and slipped back into that life. The one where you make unhealthy choices, and feel like crap. All because well you… Continue reading But they’re wrong.

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This Time I Choose Me

Set backs are inevitable, for me they happen more then most. Its so discouraging to get in a  rhythm one you can be proud of at that. All to have it torn down once the monster returns.  The illness I suffer with is currently unknown, but the attacks don't go unnoticed.  My face swells to… Continue reading This Time I Choose Me

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&& The Ship Is Sinking.

Life is full of ups, and downs, highs, and lows. One day you have it all figured out. The next the ship is sinking while everyone around you has still got their orangey glow. Actual representation of my life right now. Drawn by Me Just Ask Ma

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One Minute At a Time.

I haven't talked about this before I dont like when people feel sorry for me. However I woke up not feeling so great today, and can't seem to think of anything else. Being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Being a mom at the whim of a chronic illness is even harder.… Continue reading One Minute At a Time.

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Where Distruction and Beauty Meet.

I love the ocean it's my happy place. There's somthing so enticing about the waves. Watching them crash hard on the rocks so destructive yet so delicate. It's almost unsettling standing there as if leaving your fate to chance. As the water rises, and falls each wave getting just a bit closer. Each one pulling… Continue reading Where Distruction and Beauty Meet.